November 2nd **MOMMY GOT TO HOLD ME!!**

Today was absolutely amazing. Ben had quite a big day...never did I think it would be such a big day for me as well...Benjamin is on his 48th day of life and I got to hold my little angel for the very first time today. I cannot even explain how that felt....there are not words for it. He is such a beautiful little boy and he was so good when I held him that they let me keep him in my arms for a bit over an hour. He just slept in my arms, and as any parent knows, it is a wonderful gift to watch your baby peacefully sleeping, especially when it's in your arms after waiting nearly 7 weeks. It was very hard to give him back, as I'm not sure when I will get to hold him next. (I feel that Daddy should get the next chance....I offered the option to him today, but he graciously let me be the one to hold Benjamin). Part of the reason I got to hold him was because he got a big boy bed today. He was pretty much too big for the original bed from the beginning, but needed that type of bed for a while. Now he has more than enough room for him and all of his zoo...the stuffed animal collection just keeps growing.
Ben also had his art line removed today, so that is just one less line coming out of him. He will now be getting stuck in his heel twice a day to get his blood gases done. They also said his fluid from the chest tube is starting to lessen, so hopefully soon we will get to the point that the chest tube will be able to come out as well. In the meantime, they are weaning his pain and sedation meds by very small increments, only weaning one every other day. They are also making slow steady weans on his ventilator as well. Ben has been trying to breathe with the vent quite a bit more lately. We are also hoping to get to the point soon where he can start taking some breast milk thru a NG tube. We will of course need to see how he tolerates this and it will be VERY small amounts given at first...probably only one ml..(1/5 of a teaspoon) at a time...(this will be happening while he is also getting nutrition via his TPN). So, in other words, he will still be having a lot of changes going on and hopefully he will continue to tolerate everything even better than expected.
Again, we are still not at the point where we are guaranteed that we will be able to bring him home, and believe me...when we get to that point, I will be shouting it from the mountain tops....but I am so grateful that God has brought Benjamin this far and continue to pray for good things for our son. We spoke to one of the NICU nurses today who has a 6 year old son who is a CDH survivor...we discussed what types of things to expect both in and out of the hospital...The road to recovery is likely long, but I truly feel like we are on the right path....and will appreciate each day for it's progress and continue to be thankful for everything as it comes.
Check out the pics of his incision and even better, me holding Ben.
Love to all.